Chew. Swallow. Repeat.
Mindlessly I eat.
For years they’ve asked me why
These cravings I can’t deny
But no wisdom could I impart
To identify the hole in my heart.

Then today, an epiphany
The truth behind my struggle came to me.
Not a specific childhood trauma to blame
No one person I could name
And though they certainly left an impression
It wasn’t just bullying, grief or depression,

No. I’ve finally figured it out
And in my mind I have no doubt,
That I eat to fill the emptiness I feel
Though the issue is nothing mere food could heal
For the problem can be defined by one word only:
In truth, I am truly
Undeniably
Lonely.

© J. E. Fitzgerald, 09/08/18
A personal perspective on what it’s like to have an eating disorder, and how being in recovery has taught me to recognise the emotions which drive my unhealthy relationship with food.